What Sleep Regressions To Expect From Your Child
Sleep regressions are something that most parents dread. How to know when they are coming, what to expect, and what to do when they come can be one of the hardest things to navigate. Once you have a solid sleep plan and months of consecutive great sleep the last thing that you want to sneak in is a regression that derails everything. One thing I often tell my clients is that knowing what great sleep is and losing it is worse than never having great sleep.
The Only Real Regression
In my book, the only real "regression" is the 4 month regression, which is not a true regression. Before 4 months old, newborns only have two cycles in their sleep and essentially are awake or asleep. At the four month regression babies move from having the two cycles to four cycles. This often causes a disturbance in their sleep that lasts about 2-4 weeks, but is the perfect time to help teach independent sleep skills to help link sleep cycles. This regression can happen anywhere between 3.5 and 5 months, so don't be surprised if you think you may be in the clear then BAM - everything changes.
The reason I put the word regression in quotations is because this is not really a regression. It is actually a progression and something that each and every child will go through. It is actually a good thing developmentally and means your child is growing and developing appropriately, which is of course great.
Often during the 4 month regression you will notice a child that may have slept great now waking every 2 hours overnight and getting very upset. This is the perfect time to work on independent sleep skills. Having your little one go into the crib more awake and alert to be able to get themself to sleep at bedtime so they can replicate it in the middle of the night is key.
Other Regressions Are Development Related
Most other regressions that come up are related to development, so it will vary from child to child. Typically, parents warn of regressions coming at 6,9,12 and 18 months. But it is really that new developmental skills are being worked on at that time.
When a child is learning a new skill, they are going to take any and every opportunity to practice it. While you are changing their diaper. While you are trying to buckle them into the car seat. Even during the middle of the night. You may notice when your child is learning to sit up from laying down, learning to pull to stand or learning words they will take a while to fall asleep. Periods of quiet like before sleep or right after waking are the perfect time to work on new skills. Even waking in the middle of the night can seem like a fun time to try out their new skill.
If your child has great independent sleep skills, taking a while longer to fall asleep or waking in the middle of the night for a period should not impact anyone's sleep long term. They should not require any assistance to fall back to sleep. When they are done practicing, they will sleep again on their own and it should not last longer than a few days. Once you notice your child working on a new skill, provide lots of opportunities during the day for them to do it. More practice during the day means less practice overnight.
Regressions Keeping You Awake?
As I said above, a child with great independent sleep should not be impacted greatly by learning a new skill. But if your child isn't the greatest self soother, these can hit like a ton of bricks every few months. The biggest piece of advice I can give is to help them learn some self soothing from bedtime. It will then carry over into overnights and naps. Need some assistance? I'm here and happy to help!